Sunday, June 22, 2014

Complaining as "love making"

Complaining as "love making"


That's a trick title



and not really
it's not really a trick,
because without alchemy,
life is prison,
is hell:

the old way of complaining 
is hell
is prison
and never turns into Love making, except make up sex,
which isn't love,
it's froth

but,here,
let's discover some magic

( why else be in a relationship?)


we just need to turn the world on its head
and
that's what we always need to do

if we are to be 
awake
and 
happy
and
effective

and what other kind of life would you want to lead?


so:

you got a complaint

we have this ongoing series:

Love and Sex before dinner
 which has
10 minutes of some sort of touch connection
and 18 minutes of back and forth communication,
3  non interrupted minutes per turn, 3 turns each

so,
you have a complaint,
and it's your turn to talk....

ta da

you have three minutes to tell it to your sweetheart

here's some pointers:

be present and remember:
this is the person you love

remember:
what you think they are doing wrong,
you are too

so
try to say how you do it, too
when you say how they do it
( you don't listen, I don't listen; you get angry, I get angry at your getting angry; you take me for granted, I take you for granted..... search, it doesn't have to be an equal amount)

remember , three:

beneath all complaints is a desire
which means,
beneath all complaints could be a request

suggestion
(just in case you want to "make" love)
make the request


so:

I feel so punk when you are too busy for me


Ah, I love you

Ah, there are times when I get too busy for you

Ah, I'd like to make sure we spend more time together..
Can we talk later about some extra times we can spend together?




Now....
this half hour before dinner, Love and Sex before dinner

is
the MINIMUM
to have sweetness

how can you get more out of it?

do it more

but only for the love and fun
of it

and the joy of waking up as a partnership in enlightenment

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