Awakened relationship, #7 in Love and Sex Before Dinner

Two people get together

they are lonely
or
they are open
or
they are lucky

and, anyway,
they decide to open up to the charm
of a new being

someone who is different than them

if they are unlucky
they get off to a bang sexually
( and I won't go into that until ten or twenty
chapters down the line)

but let's say this:
touch is crucial

they need to hold hands
they
need to kiss

and the important thing is
....

if they are lucky,
they wake up to the miracle

the miracle

the miracle

I am alive
in this moment

and they share that with the other
person

and the other person:
yes, I am alive in this moment

he: I am alive in this moment
I am excited and awake
to being here with you

she: I am alive in this moment
I can feel my life
and can feel us sharing this
moment

and so on

....
time passes
they come together

they have good days,
whoopie

they have stressful days,
and here's the rub

in the stress they can
be either mindful,
which is to say:
aware of the miracle

I am alive
and I am feeling stress
and I want to lash out
but what I am really feeling is..
sad about ..
afraid about...
worried about...
incompetent about...

mindful
and we can be free to explore what's bothering us

mindless
we have to default
to whatever our programing is

which is usually what
Ma
and
Pa
did when they were under stress

which usually looked like
blame
or avoidance
or
manipulation
or
whatever

who cares,
that's why so many therapists stay so busy

bad Ma and Pa training

and
you can therapize forever
and
have all the insight in the world

and if you aren't present
to yourself
and your partner
when the stress comes on

you are going to be mindless

which means
Ma
and Pa
stuff

and it's not any more complicated than that

and it's the whole world
of difference

freedom in mindfulness

slavery to conditioned/ robot responses
in mindlessness

this sounds kind or sermonesque

sorry,
that's my father's righteous robot

and
hey,
it can be a game,

the let me catch my robot and
admit it game

and then,
fingers touching the keyboard,
birds singing and cooing out the window
breath in and out

and I'm back
home
to now

how about
YOU?

cheers
Chris