Two people, going present, then asking.....

Two people sit together

they agree to be present for the whole twenty minutes they
are going to talk

this isn't a timer discussion,
and
there is a commitment to wait, a nice long time
while listening to the other,
in case they have a little more to say

And you
are going to
sit

and be present

and wait for a question

a question that is important,

or a question that is fueled with curiosity

or a question
that is waiting in the room for one of you to discover
and
admit

admit to the room
admit to yourselves that it wants to be asked
"wants" to be asked

and as you wait,
be present
to yourself
in gravity
and
yourself in air,
breathing

be present to the other person
especially their eyes and their smile,
or not yet smile

( sooner or later, if you are telling the truth
and asking the truth
and
listening

a smile will come)

pay attention to the heart that is beating
inside your chest

and then ask your important question

always this way:

both of you are going to answer it.


So you don't ask:

"Do you love me?"

You ask, "How is your love for me going? What's easy about it, and what's hard?"

And then you both have to answer.

Slowly.

Searching.

Fumbling.

Admitting the other into your inner world

Admitting you don't know it all



And, as set up above:

Wait a long time, for them to find one or two or three more
aspects they might want to avoid in a certain way

Wait a long time in the silence when they are really done.

don't start till you've gotten quiet and heard what they had to say.

Then give your answer.


And,
if you want,
after that, what you can do, is take turns saying,
"What I got about you from what I heard you say, was..."

Or, you could put that before the second person answers the question.

It's not important.

Sharing what's deep is.

and

Whoever came up with the first question, the other person comes up with the next one.

love "making"

I like the term love making

love is worth
making

making better

making more conscious

making more communicative


what if every communication
were a
chance
to
"make"

love more real

what if the various thrashings around
under the sheets
were
slowed
slowed
slowed

way down

and the big huff and puff to climax
were sidestepped

and in
the slow
slow
slow

the making
of the WE
that baby of US

were what was important?

wouldn't that be a worthwhile way
to waste time
in the flesh

or in
the talk

or in
the silence
of non talk
not touch

but together

making....

what?

ah, discovery


good

Awake in talk, in touch, in makeout, in ...., all of you

slow down
connect deeply
wake up
discover love

awake you don't have to rush

you talk
and then your partner talks

the goal
be present while you talk
be present while you listen

then
ten minutes of sex

ten minutes in which
not to hurry
not to have any climax

just to get touching
and the juices flowing

make out:
naked

lots of touch

cock sucking,
slow,
no effort to climax

guy: relax,
let it be overwhelming
don't help
relax

woman:
go slow
sense it all

don't try to get any werhe


clitoris stroking

sit so you can see easily
lubricate
go slowly
stay on the clitoris

don't try to get her off

woman:
don't mov
don't help

just feel
just sense

both of you:
stay in the moment

ten minutes of touch

twenty minutes of talk

walk up

love without waking will always turn
to a mess

( messes aren't bad,
but this half hour is for waking up,
not making more of messes

plenty of them in life)

slow
slower
slowly

sense your body
sense your relationship to gravity
follow your body

wake up
good